Baby Peach Fuzz

Blank Books of Thankfulness

I spent the last four days in Denver, Colorado with my sister. One afternoon she tucked me away at a little bookstore called the "Tattered Cover".  If I owned a bookstore, I would want it kind of like this: full of cubby holes and nooks with couches and wooden chairs. Nearly everything is wooden; the ceiling beams are exposed and the floor creaks. Books seem to belong wrapped around with more of themselves, more tree. And sitting among the stained shelves, running my hand along the smooth wood-grain of the table, I feel at home... almost.

I sat next to the blank book section. This was a bit of a difficulty as I am somewhat of a fanatic for blank books and journals. I am very picky about them, however, preferring certain styles and most importantly narrow lines. Blank books are full of possibility, so full of promise, they are empty and unknown. They are the place for stories, real stories, that have not become yet. They are untold. This is exciting... most of the time. The uncertainty can be terrifying as well, that is, if the focus is on the emptiness of the page rather than the story and its author.  

714. A long talk with Katie
715. Unlimited minutes phone plan
716. New pink shirt
717. Scarves
718. I like my feet!
719. New jeans and earphones
720. Being sure of my shoes
721. Laughing with Laurel
722. My sister forgave me for how I treated her as a child
723. I did a lot of confessing as a kid
724. My parents are so creative!
725. New underwear
726. "We Would See Jesus" by Roy and Revel Hession
727. "The Tattered Cover" bookstore that provides inspiration and rest
728. Little boy at Chinese grocery
729. My new computer
730. Jake's giggles
731. Little boys who like to go fishing
732. Mango Caramel Chicken
733. Cilantro
734. Successful made-up pasta salad!
735. Laughing with Katie

My Parents' Yellow Pot-Tower

Backyard Pics

Tulip Thankfulness

I've much to be thankful for. I haven't been very good at writing it all down lately... 
God is good.
 
694. Pauli's here
695. Feeling grief
696. Dirty feet
697. Never being suspected
698. Team phone call
699. Being done with my speech
700. A good chat with Molly
701. Only one social engagement today
702. Fear Not... for I am with you
703. Flowers delivered from Lizzy
704. Doggy snores
 

705. Lizzy-isms
706. Moments of quiet
707. Mom's foot and back rubs
708. Playing games (like Settlers of Catan)
709. Finding new favorite clothes
710. A nice pedicure that still lasts!
711. Jeeves and Wooster
712. Jesus Calling gift from a friend
713. My mother's tulips 
 
 

Bees

Thankful List Backlog

634. Funny spellings and English on the headstone

635. A beautiful view

636. The circle road and how you never will be impossibly lost in this city

637. BreathSavers peppermints however old

638. Being compared to a terrorist organization

639. the one lone flower left

640. The K fam squished into one triangle of the rotating dorway

641. All the luggage making it through

642. Being upgraded to business class and it being awesome

643. My salty gift: more tears

644. My sweet gift: Jason Gray's song "How I Ended Up Here"

645. My gift just right:  an awesome back massage

646. D having my back

647. Refining fire

648. Praying together

649. Communion

650. My years here at the school

651. Students who love me and want me to be their teacher

652. Precocious 5th graders

653. Kids who come to school anyway

654. The reflection room

655. A meeting with Y

656. That Y doesn't have it out for me

657. The thunderstorm, lightning, hail, and drenching rain

658. Wrapped sea glass necklace

659. Communal battery licking

660. Faithlynn's teary performance

661. He will complete that which he has begun  (He doesn't give up!)

662. He gives comfort

663. H's tears of love for me

664. Y making some sense when he talks

665. Pepperoni

666. Pizzas

667. Tear drops of concern and care

668. My new enjoyment  of eggs

669. Pasta with parmesan cheese

670. Whiteboards in my classrooms

671. A dear friend who fasts and prays for me

672. A power outage that brings quiet from construction noise so I can take a nap

673. Hannah here for a visit

674. Student comments that could get me in t

675. The love and care of my team for me

676. The tulips spreading wide in the heat of the afternoon

677. The hyacinths' blooming smell

678. Great quotes from great writers

679. Katie's news! Yay!

680. Being an idiot again

681.Teaching girls to become women of character

682. Green mountains

683. My car didn't blow up today

684. Getting fresh clothes for tomorrow.

685. I know faithful teens

686. Bone-weary days

687. Being counted worthy

688. A rose in a glass

689. A momentary panic  seeing a man with an earpiece--but able to recover

690. Bacon

691. Full breakfast with no puking

692. Chatting with Molly

693. Super fast internet

Cheekwood

Back in the States...

Weary...but...

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, 

if we do not give up. --Galatians 6:9

Ok. But what happens when we ARE weary whether we like it or not? I ask myself this because I am weary. Physically, emotionally, and spiritually. But I've found that some clarity comes from the later part of the verse... "do not give up". I am not giving up.

For this I toil, struggling with all his energy that he powerfully 

works within me.--Colossians 1:29

This I can do only be God's grace and His power that works within me. I know that my power will not suffice. But in my weakness that feels nearly overwhelming at times, I see God's perfect grace and love. I hear him rejoice over me with singing, not because of anything I've done, but just out of his beautifying love. How great his grace. All is grace.

Thankful today.

612. Grieving in front of the world
613. The casket not fitting at first and D joking about how you can't keep a good man down
614. "How the Emptiness Sings"
615. People who write me their prayers for me
616. Old friends who know me
617. Loaning books on kindle
618. A chat with my friends gathered in Nashville for the Memorial Service there
619. Lots and lots of city power lately
620. All the people who deliver meals
621. Hot showers
622. the blood of Christ
623. forgiveness through the blood
624. cleansing through the blood
625. Jer's Bangladeshi skirt
626. getting over nearly vomiting at the sight and smell of blood

627. new back exercises and stretches that give me something to do that is focused

628. our working propane heater

629. hours that continue to pass by

630. being open and honest when people ask me how I'm doing (I don't know!)

631. the donations from the students for the family's tickets here

632. The continuing construction next door that lets me know of life going on

633. the ability to just be

For Such a Time As This...

The books on my shelf speak to me: You have been prepared.

A Severe Mercy by Sheldon Vanuaken--The story of a man whose wife dies and he counts it mercy.
A Chance to Die by Elizabeth Elliot--The biography of Amy Carmichael and her willingness to die to self.
A Path Through Suffering also by Elizabeth Elliot
A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis

A few other biographies, some Agatha Christie mysteries, and Augustine's Confessions are there too. Some school books peer back at me with mocking as I avoid processing my grades. But those few titles stood out to me. These have been some of my favorite books and they are ready to walk with me again. Why did I love them before? Has God been preparing me for this? 

Luke 1:76-79

“And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Highest;
For you will go before the face of the Lord to prepare His ways,
To give knowledge of salvation to His people
By the remission of their sins,
Through the tender mercy of our God,
With which the Dayspring from on high has visited us;
To give light to those who sit in darkness and the shadow of death,
To guide our feet into the way of peace.”

Again Thankful... maybe?

Today I tried to be thankful as my grief was filmed  and photographed for national and international media.

Is this grace too?

"Really, God? This too?"
And he said, "Yes, this and all things for My glory."
"Is my pain to be spectacle?"
"Was Jesus' pain secret? Was it quiet and alone?"

"Ahhh... I see... this is part of the suffering.... And so I rejoice that I am counted worthy to suffer for Christ to be like him in all things."

All is Grace

All that I can do right now is count the little things... 


580. Finishing my little booklets project!
581. Pepperoni pizza
582. The smell of disinfectant
583. A good hair day
584. The grey tan sky with sun beams breaking through
585. Having made cinnamon rolls a month ago and put them in the freezer
586. The body of Christ is my family
587. The whole city is my family
588. The loss of my dear friend and colleague and my dear student (trying to be thankful here)
589. Peace with lots of people in my home
590. Food brought
591. Toilet paper brought
592. My team is my family
593. Ladies who come and remind me to eat
594. Heart-wrenching pain and the solemnity it causes
595. Joy from realizing the good that will come from sorrow and hurt
596. Understanding the meaning of communion and blood so much better
597. Notes, e-mails, condolences
598. Laughter over fond and funny memories
599. Pictures taken of quotes on my wall... "What is the gift in THIS moment?"
600. New found boldness
601. The beautiful snow that covers the city in white, there is so much symbolism there.
602. Identifying the attack of the evil one in myself and banishing it
603. Three days of our house filled wall to wall with people that are going from grief to joy
604. A day at home without more than 30 people in our home...
605. The flowers that people brought--so beautiful
606. Homemade toffee nut lattes brought by a dear friend
607. God's provision on a grand scale
608. My first night of solid sleep in several days
609. J doing our laundry, bless that woman!
610. The flower pin that R gave me and gives me hope
611. The knowledge that God will give me the grace to handle each day as it comes, even if looking forward can seem overwhelming

Freshly Planted

My latest craft project...

My prize box has been getting a little sparse lately. My students have been doing too well and therefore getting more prizes than I predicted. If I were going to have a problem, I guess this one would be one I would choose. One of their favorite things has been the little blank books I brought back from the States.

 

I used my sewing machine to sew several trimmed pieces of paper into a piece of fancy card stock.

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I had a lot of fun putting these together. I just need to find a good way to make some look a little more masculine. Adding rivets, eyelets, and ribbon brought them up another notch. I think my fifth graders will really think these are great prizes... I hope.

  

Dishing it Up

This weekend my roommate and I took the time to get some much needed (and some not so needed) shopping done. For one, we bought a vacuum. It's beautiful and yellow and has a rotating brush to get up all of our long hair. It also is a good brand so we won't have to go shopping for another one for a very long time. In the Middle East, there are lots of knock off brands and things that come from who knows where. These can look legit but they die in a week and the shop owners will certainly not take it back. So it pays to be careful.

While the yellow vacuum cleaner is awesome and colorful, there were some other things that brought even more color and fun into our house.
At the bazaar we went through the second-hand fabric shops and found several new tablecloths. All are bright and cheerful and each one cost about a dollar. Yay for second hand!

Then we visited a pottery and dish store that we've been hearing about for months. Some of our dishes are chipped or cracked and I broke yet another bowl the other day. And so we decided to add to our collection and brighten them up some too. They are all so pretty!  

 

 I also have a list of things I am thankful for from this past week. 

559. Team dinner on a Wednesday

560. F's hugs

561. N and D thanking me for their Bibles

562. E-mails of encouragement in the dark times

563. New dishes in bright colors

564. Yellow vacuum cleaner

565. Bright tablecloths

566. The super helpful man at the Bosch store

567. Birthday flowers still growing weeks later.

568. The Litany of Humility

569. Planting my seeds

570. Bulbs sprouting in pots

571. Chasing the propane truck... it's good exercise especially if you don't manage to catch it

572. The Beatitudes

573. A new (surprise!)brother in Christ--how great is our God!

574. Knee Deep by the Zac Brown Band and my sister for playing it as her wake up alarm over Christmas--now it just makes me happy!

575. Trips to the bazaar with friends

576. Nacho Libre and nachos night with friends

577. Sunshine flooding in through lace curtains

578. K and Y saying that when they grow up they want to come back and teach at the school

579. Encouraging e-mails and friends praying for me